I'm so sick of the game industry. Its gotten so competitive that its virtually impossible to make any money. You either have to have millions and millions to make a competitive game, or make casual games, even those take some money to make. You can't get a deal if you don't have a large team. You can't even get contract work now, unless you have a large team. You can't make a game without money. How the hell are you supposed to make a living in this industry? I'll be damned to hell if I'm going to invest one minute or my own money into some demo just so I can be told it's not good enough 10000 times before it gets signed. Its just SO frustrating. The only option is to be a slave and get a job. FUCK THAT. You know why? Because I'd have to move and never see my kids or family again. So because I actually care about people, I cannot do what I really love to do, or do it for a living that is.
That makes me question things a lot. What is better a struggling dad who's here, or a stacked dad who's there? Or maybe I'd be better off just getting the hell out of the game industry all together. I'm already on my way out, but I wanted it to be MY choice. Mainly I'm venting because I lost my contract work from NC Soft... and soon I'll be flat broke in a small city where 10 dollars an hour is the ceiling. You have to be your own boss to make anything in this area, but I'm wondering what to do. I know I'll eventually find contract work in the game industry... but I don't want it to be after I have to suck it down and get a job or start some new business. I guess I want life to be easier. I only need a couple years of decent pay and I'd have enough rentals that I wouldn't need to work any more. I could give everyone a finger if I CHOSE to.
I guess thats where I want to be in life. Being able to give everyone a finger and be making money while I sleep. Passive income is beautiful. I really miss having a team to make games though. This work from my basement stuff is crap. I don't know why I can't find a deal or why I can't get contract work. I'm damn good at what I do, but this industry is all about who's buddy you are. If you don't know anyone where you are applying you might as well not bother. Talent has nothing to do with anything, unless you are like uber talented. I'm talking leagues above everyone, then your portfolio might get you something. But generally speaking its all about who you know, so if you get anything useful from this, NETWORK YOUR ASS OFF! If you don't network and know a jillion people then you won't make it. I don't know enough people, period.
I don't mean to be negative. What a way to kick off my blog, right in the middle of "the shit has hit the fan" time, lol. I'm a funny joking person, but writing my anger helps me walk away from the PC a better person. The bad thing is anyone who reads this stuff will think I'm some jaded freakshow, lol. But seriously, I do feel better venting. This stuff is all straight from the heart. The sick thing is, a fat contract could roll in at any time and then I'm talking about how damn great life is.
I am getting better at handling the stress of no contracts and no income. I think if I didn't have this rental to work on I'd be going absolutely crazy though. At least I can go rock. I love working. I'm a work aholic. I love fixing things and feeling progress. That is why the game industry sucks ass, I am not progressing. I should be making millions by now and have 50 guys. Instead its just me. I got an email today saying "No man is an Island" and its funny how that is starting to make sense to me. I realize I need more people to help me make cool games. But people need money and getting money is not easy. Publishers want your game about done. Thats not easy to do. Screw working on games at nights and on weekends, I'm not in my twenties any more. I prefer a real life.
Things are getting better though. Sometimes you just have to keep on keeping on and have faith that it will all work out. Try harder. I'm done now. I'll go work on my portfolio some more, lol.